What is Life Really Like if You're a Sex Addict?

Alright, so here’s the deal: I’ve always been a guy with a huge appetite for sex—like, three times a day minimum. Yeah, it’s a lot. That mindset wrecked my late teens and early twenties. I cheated on partners, tried hooking up with friends, and even encouraged them to cheat on their partners. It was a total disaster. For about five years, sex controlled my life, and no matter how many hookups I squeezed into a day, it never felt like enough.

​

Then came the curveball: I fell for this incredible girl—smart, funny, everything I wanted—but she’s asexual. You heard me right—no interest in sex at all. Early on, we tried it a couple of times—super basic, like the blandest vanilla—and then she was done. Didn’t want to keep going, didn’t enjoy it. At first, I thought I’d lose my mind. I even went as far as using an OnlyFans Finder to distract myself. But eventually, I had this moment of clarity: Do I keep chasing hookups and feeling empty, or do I commit to something real? Love won out.

​

Now, that doesn’t mean it’s all rainbows and butterflies. My sex drive hasn’t magically vanished. I’m still a guy who wants it all the time. I catch myself hoping she’ll change her mind anytime she says something even a little flirty, only to crash back to reality when she doesn’t. To cope, I’ve basically become my own best friend (if you know what I mean)—3-5 times a day isn’t unusual. Honestly, there are moments when the temptation creeps in. I’ll think about old flames or feel the pull to be that porn hoarder guy I used to be.

​

But here’s the thing: what I have with her is worth way more than the empty thrill of hookups. It’s not perfect—I’m still figuring out how to balance my needs with our relationship—but I know I’d rather fight for this connection than throw it away chasing something that’ll never truly satisfy me.